Philosophic Rebuttal Ananda and NY Times Articles Regarding Girls Being Married Young

Aug 6, 2006 by ameyatma das {ACBSP}

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Aug 6, 2006 by ameyatma das {ACBSP}

I have not read the NY Times article that Ananda was referring to, so I can only speak of it based on the information he supplied.

He says that it spoke of a girl of 11 years of age being given in arranged marriage to a man of 55 years of age as his second wife. It said how this marriage dashed this girl's dreams, as she had wanted to someday become a teacher. This sort of marirage was seen as cruel, supressive, morally degrading. Ananda claimed it was no different then men who exploit young girls in the West on the internet in order to sexually molest them.

Such a comparrison is utterly non-sense and made by someone blinded by envy. There is no remote similarity at all in character or motive of the men involved.

The girl was given in marriage by the father. In such cultures the motive and objective is the religious and moral protection of the girl. Ananda, in speaking as a representative of the UN and Western Human Rights activists does not like these aspects of other cultures and works to see such cultures attacked and destroied.

We do not know the situation of the village where this marriage took place. But, more than likely the older man was probably doing better materially then others. The father must have seen that his daughter will be best taken care of and provided for in this arrangment.

There was an article in an Indian magazine many years ago, probably about 10 years back, which told of a man in India who was then 75 years old who had 9 wives. The youngest wife was 30, he had married her when he was 60 and she was 15. It told how and why the man took so many wives. Even though his father also had many wives, he said that he never desired this, that it all came about by the will of providence. It happened that he moved to the current village years ago and he became successful in his business. He became so successful that he employed many of the people of the village. And, even though he holds no government position, the people of the village see him as a final judge in many social disputes and go to him for his advice. He said that some years after marryng his first wife, the father of another girl approached him and said, you are doing so well, you are the most wealthy and successful man of our village. So, could you please accept my daughter as a second wife? This marriage took place when India law still allowed polygamy. It was not the man's desire, but he agreed to the proposal.

After taking the second wife, family members of the first wife also wanted him to take their daughter. And, in this way, most of his 9 wives came from familes of the first 2 wives. Even so many years later, at the age of 60, a family member of his first wife asked him to take their young daughter as his 9th wife.

At 75 he had over 30 children and 150 wives, children and grandchildren in total lived with him in his compound. And, still, the village elders respect him and go to him for advice.

His wives did not have any complaints. Even the 30 year old girl married at 15 to a man 45 years older then herself. She had no complaint. She not only had a husband, but there was a whole community of loving and caring family members who helped raise her children. The first wife was like the mother-superior. All the other wives accepted her as their authority. And, the man was asked, what was the secret to keeping 9 wives happy? He said the secret is that he does not have favorites, that he treats all of them completely equal. If one wife needs a new skirt or sari, then he takes them all to the market and all are bought equal goods. He never gave any wife preference. Yet, all the other wives do give the first and eldest co-wife respects and always obey her orders. This way the clan is kept orderly and happy.

Afghanistan has been in a horrible war. Who knows how many young men had been killed in that village. Even if not, the father had his reasons for giving his young daughter to this man as 2nd wife. It is 'their' culture, and 'their' religion. In their religion this is perfectly moral and religious, regardless of how outsiders may see it. But, the outsiders want to force their ideas of morality on everyone else. Of course, there are limits. But, Mohamed married his 4 other wives after his first wife died. He was 55 when he was asked to marry a girl who some say was only 6, others say she was 9. No consumation of the marriage would be acceptable if the girl had not reached puberty (had first menstruation). However, to have the girl married at such a young age is not morally or religiously wrong, in either the view of Mohamed or the Vedas.

The argument is that society is so much more degraded today. Today men, as in 'all' men, only want to sexually exploit young girls. Thus, today, no such marriage of young girls can be tolerated or accepted.

While it is true that society is more degraded today, this is not a reason to thwart religious morality but it is a time when religious morality is more needed then ever.

-- incomplete...

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Aug 6, 2006 by ameyatma das {ACBSP}

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Aug 6, 2006 by ameyatma das {ACBSP}